Sunday, October 12, 2008

Got Bucket?

Because you will need one as this is LAPCPADPOUB Day (Let's All Post Cat Photos And Dire Poetry On oUr Blogs) brought to you courtesy of Happy Mouffetard (but you may call her Mouffe) in response to an article by James The Hat where he wrote and I quote: "While many blogs can be both well written and extremely useful (it's obvious that he's writing about Bliss here), others are immensely dull, heavy on sentiment, bad poetry and with far, far too many cats for comfort. "
That last bit is not of the Bliss at all, but never mind, we can easily remedy that.

Here goes.

Got your bucket at the ready for some revoltingly cute kittycat pics?

You have been warned!
Awwwwwwwwwwwww, look at its widdle nosey all covered in cream
Ohhhhhhhh, such adorable fluffy fur babies! Looking at them just makes you wanna hug and kiss and pet them.
Oh look, the widdle pussycats are hugging, and look at those tiny widdle feet and tailsy wailsies. Too cute for words!
Ickle pussy Pumpkin with some pumpkins. Who's a pretty Polly Pumpkin then?

Warning, cuteness overload! Continue at your peril.

Look at their sweet ickle faces, couldn't you just eat them up with a spoon?
Awwwwwwwwwww, this furry widdle princess looks like a badger and she's called Badger too, how cute is that?
Ohhhhhhhhh, aaahhhh, awwwwwwww, just look at that widdle paw, this darling little furry purry puss baby is saying Hi!

How's the bucket situation?

Filled to the brim?

You're certain you want to continue?

You are aware that you will suffer from brain meltdown due to far too much cuteness?

Consider yourself thoroughly warned!

Awwww, the little fluffy princess Bombalurina loves Garfield. Isn't that totally sweet?

Gentle reader, have one or more of your teeth dropped out yet from all that sugary sweetness?

......................... (speechless) Widdle Dolly in a widdle pink box as a pressy for Chrissy and she is wearing a tiny bow !!!
Goo, goo, ga, ga, glurk, prrrrrrrrrttt, gurgle, burp, goo, goo, ga ZAP

Bliss News Flash

We're sorry to have to interrupt this post as our caption writer has been rushed to hospital due to a severe brain meltdown. We apologize for any inconvenience this may cause our readers.

Further news:

From our correspondent in Great Britain:

I'm standing here near the house of one James Alexander-Sinclair, who is world famous in the UK for his stylish hat wearing and, slightly less so, for the odd garden or two he's designed. His house is under siege as we speak and his garden is in danger of being trampled by a herd of hundreds upon hundreds of livid cat lovers. So far they've been casting aspersions on his character, been involved in a brutal spot of mud and rotten eggs throwing and some severe attacks of finger pointing have been breaking out as we speak. (Watch it mate, less of the finger pointing, will you, you nearly poked my eye out.)

The whole upheaval was caused by an article written by Mr J.A.S in which he, allegedly, viciously attacked the reputation of the world's most beloved pet; the cat.

I've just been interviewing a close friend of J A-S and it seems that he's prone to wear his hats in the bath. While writing the now infamous article Mr A-S was wearing one of his hats that unfortunately had shrunken in the bath and the tight fit caused an obstruction in the blood flow to his brain which, in its turn, caused the writing of that slanderous and vicious attack on the world's most beloved kittycats. Allegedly.

More on this later, now over to The Netherlands.

Thank you for that fascinating report, we are waiting with baited breath for any further developments. In the studio with us is our expert, the world famous kittycat connoisseur and garden fashionista, Yolanda Elizabet from Bliss. Welcome!

Thank you.

Yolanda, is it true that there are far, far too many cats for comfort?

Of course not. How can that possibly be? I've done a lot of in depth research on this matter and collected a whole lot of evidence showing clearly that there can never be too many cats.
They're fantastic babysitters.
Great for cleaning dishes.
Ever watchful so that no harm befalls us.
Good company to have around where ever you may be.
Not forgetting of course, how highly decorative they are in the garden. No tastefully hand carved marble statue made by the likes of Michelangelo could ever top that.

I rest my case.

And now, for something completely different; a spot of dire poetry!

Lament Written by a Distraught Poetess on the Sad Demise of Her Deeply Beloved Puss Peterkins Who Tragically Drowned in a Saucer of Milk (the cat not the poetess)



He snuffed it.


The end

Another poem by the same poetess laureate


Twinkle
The fluffy pussycat Twinkle
Did a little tinkle
In James's favourite hat
And that was pretty much that.
(Except for the callous killing of the budgie
by James)

More coverage on LAPCPADPOUB Day can be found here and here. Enjoy!


NO HARM HAS COME TO ANY ANIMAL IN THE MAKING OF THIS POST ALTHOUGH WE ARE UNABLE TO REPEAT WHAT J A-S SAID WHEN HE PUT ON HIS FAVOURITE HAT AFTER TWINKLE DID HIS TINKLE.

Copyright 2008 Y.E.W. Heuzen

58 comments:

HappyMouffetard said...

Absolutely wonderful! I am speechless with 'admiration' of all the kewt kitty photos. And as for the poetry - a delight!

Thank you for taking part in LAPCPADPOUB Day!
HM

Victoria said...

Oh goodness, I can't stop laughing! That is one 24-carat, five-bucket Kewt Kitty post.

VP said...

Fantastic Yolanda :D

My sides are hurting from all my laughing (or was it the throwing up?). I particularly like your toilet humour!

Mmwh mwh mwh = I can't talk properly anymore as my teeth have fallen out owing to a surfeit of treacle

Toodle pip!

Arabella Sock said...

HA ha! Your post is a must see..

I got as far as widdle cutie in a pink box before vomming!

artistsgarden said...

I cannot talk because I am laughing so much.
Wonderful
K

Benjamin Vogt said...

I don't know what is more disturbing about the potty shot, but my imagination needs to stop imagining asap. Terrific photos!

Zoë said...

Just fabulous!!! I have oooooed and ahhhhhed all the way through that, and didnt feel in the least nauseous!

Lottie Wannabe said...

Wow! Those photos are good enough to sell. Very original. I might have panicked if I was the mother of that baby, but otherwise I think they are great!

Cheryl said...

Soooooo funny.......I shall be laughing for the rest of day.....

easygardener said...

So, so funny. The pictures are a joy and the captions extremely nauseating. Well done!

Arabella Sock said...

Yolanda-E, I need advice from catwoman extrodinaire. My liddle girlie pusscat loves a cuddle but she kneads my arms with her little claws out and makes holes in my flesh or jumper. Is there any way I can stop her doing this?

Robin's Nesting Place said...

Oh, now you've caused me to want a kitten. They are so cute! Great post!

Casbah Kitten said...

OK, I'll have to let my friends know about this....WAY cute! I love the news flash too as I WAS on the brink of cuteness overload....

;D

Flighty said...

A purrfectly wonderful entry!
As a cat loving blogging gardener you have my full support! xx

Titania said...

Hi Yolanda Elisabeth. All this has filled my bucket. I have many so go on with the show!
I had a complet meltdown by the sight of all those gorgous, teeny weeny creatures; I think you have hit the jackpot. Have a nice week T.

Piondröm said...

Oh...what a nice kitten gallery.
We just love cats in all forms, small, big, kitten, older dosent matter.
Taday our dougther coled home, and tell us that she just has bring home a new kitten, a buy colled Baltazar.
Ken

GardenJoy4Me said...

Yolanda ... my god girl ! This was just too funny .. I miss that Dutch humour .. right to the point and with a warning shot over the bow ? LOL
I have so many silly pictures in my head from what you have written and the pictures ... well .. I need to go lay down with a cold compress ! LOL
Extremely fantastic job well done !
Joy

Kat Wolfdancer said...

DELIGHTED! And another Ol' Possums Book of Practical Cats fan to boot! YESH! Must post pictures when I arrive at my domicile. The new litter will definitely deliver cuteness in diabetic doses. Wee teensie shut-eyed tinies.
http://wolfdancercreek.blogspot.com/

>^,,^<

em said...

very funny! 3 cheers for you!

Juliet said...

The kittens are sickeningly cute, but I really love the cat pretending to be an elegant statue in the garden.

Excellent bad poetry :-D

nikkipolani said...

Clearly, a man who's never been owned by a cat!

mss @ Zanthan Gardens said...

No one does cute cat overload like you do, that's for sure! I do love your gray ones, though. I wish I could keep a cat of my own--sometimes.

Rose said...

LOL, I enjoyed every minute of reading this post, Yolanda! So glad I stopped by. Any person who doesn't think a kitten is the epitome of cuteness doesn't have a heart or soul, in my opinion:)
If JAS doesn't award one of the prizes to you, I shall boo him soundly!

jodi said...

Oh my gosh, what a fun, fun post! and as you know, Yolanda, there are NEVER too many cute photos or photos of cats that are toooooo cute. However, there should be a warning that some readers might feel the overwhelming desire to have kittens again...

nancybond said...

Brilliant! Your photos are just too cute!

Cottage Magpie said...

My husband just rushed to my side, hearing me gasping for air from the other room. Alarmed at my inability to catch my breath, ready to dial emergency, I finally grabbed his wrist to stop him and pointed at the screen.

That's when he realized I was laughing as hard as humanly possible.

He has gone back to his project in some disgust.

:-)

Thanks for the laugh! You're the best!
~Angela :-)

Pam/Digging said...

Hilarious, YE! You had me laughing out loud over your sugary sweet captions. You really ran with this meme.

James said...

That was so wonderfully, fabulously, gloriously, unspeakably ghastly I am completely bowled over. Believe it or not a cat has actually peed in one of my hats before now: I did not put it on but it was never the same again.

Naturegirl said...

Yolanda you crack me up! Anyone viewing this post reading your prose certainly knows without a doubt that you LoVe your puddy cats!!
To one cat lover from another..purzzzzzzzz ...NG and her two cats

Trisha xx said...

Fab!

Frances said...

Hi YE, yes, I believe you warmed to the topic as you went along, the momentum kept building. Like Beethoven, we thought it was the end with the gray in the cup, but no, just a bit more. Your poetry is brilliant and the cats sublime.

Frances
http://fairegarden.wordpress.com/

emmat said...

i love the cat in the teapot

[wiping away tears of laughter]

Ewa said...

I Fully agree!! NEVER too many cats!!

Gail said...

YE this is the best! I am still laughing as I type this! Then I zipped over to Mouffe and James for more on the story! Have a fantastic week!

Gail

Lisa at Greenbow said...

Tooo darned funny. Yes, this was a post of cuteness.

Cindy said...

I am laughing SO HARD right now! Oh goodness, I needed that! The cute attack was great but the laughing fit was superb! Thank you!!!!!!

Cindy

Kylee said...

You just crack me up!!!! LOLOLOL And of course, you know that it wouldn't be too much kitty sweetness for me. I brush and floss regularly. ;-)

by Glo said...

What an entertaining post ~ you have brought smiles and laughter to many around the world :)

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Cambodian Team said...

cool blog and cool cats :) i do love cat but my mum doesn't so :( Anyway keep up your good work.

Greeting from Cambodia,
Rath

Dog Breeds said...

beautiful pictures with cats. They are so lovely. i would like to have some

Tracy said...

There can never been enough cute kitty photos...keep them coming! :o) Happy Days ((HUGS))

gerti said...

Bijzonder grappig en de foto’s bij elkaar: hartverwarmend! Begrijp niet hoe iemand zonder onze veelzijdige helpers kan ;-)

Viooltje said...

Your cuteness overload warning should have been made MORE visible! lol
I'm not going to compliment on the photos as that would require me scrolling up again and I can't handle all that! Nevertheless, the poetry has left me speechless ;-) Thanks for making my day Yolanda.

Kerri said...

Totally terrific kitty pics Yolanda...cuteness personified...plus perfectly dreadful prose - truly nauseating. LOL
And all before breakfast! What a way to start my day. Thank you very much! :)

bronze garden statues said...

I've seen some great garden blogs, and yours is the first that has so much about kats! Great post!

jane said...

Ugh, the horror, the horror

Mr. McGregor's Daughter said...

LOL! I needed that bucket to catch all the tears streaming down my face from laughing. I almost busted a gut. Thanks, I really needed that.

Yolanda Elizabet said...

Hi and and welcome to a cuteness overload on Bliss. It was fun making this post and it's obvious that you all had lots of fun reading it. It's always a plus when you can make people laugh IMO.

*Arabella: you could clip her nails for starters, blunt nails are less painful.If you have never clipped her nails before ask someone who has done it many times to show you, perhaps your vet?

Another thing that you could do is gently pinch her pawpads when she's sticking her nails in you. If you gentle pinch her pawpads, her nails will get pulled back in. This is how I used to teach my kittens not to stick their nails into humans.

Another possibility is ordering nail caps from the US for Hebe. Check out www.softpaws.com/ but there are others who sell those artificial nails too (Google is your friend). You simply glue them on and that's that. Cats tolerate the nail caps very well.

Hope this helps. :-)

Thanks everybody for commenting; I enjoyed reading each and every comment. :-D

reddnas1 said...

YE, I laughed so hard I nearly wet my pants. No? Oh, maybe that was Sophie, who found my pants first.

Too funny for words!~~Dee

Salix Tree said...

squeeeeeeeeeeeellll!
Me loves lil kittieeeeees!
;-) adorable post.

HappyMouffetard said...

Congratulations on your prize winning post!

themanicgardener said...

That was a scream. Too funny. I did wonder how you got the cat into the pot, but I've caught mine trying to get into boxes much too small for them, so maybe it was voluntary.

One question lingers: how the heck many cats do you have?
--Kate

Arabella Sock said...

Yolanda-E
Thanks for that. She hasn't had her nails trimmed so I think I will get that done at the vets. I will try the paw-pinching too. Not sure about the false nails but if all else fails... She is making rather a lot of tiny holes in my jumpers and skin at the moment.

Congrats on the very well deserved award.

lisa said...

That's positively hilarious!

Free Music said...

nice blog

Vilma said...

Thak you for your wonderful pics and exquisite sense of humour!! LOL!!!