Tuesday, April 13, 2010

Speed Weeding


You have heard of speed dating before, unless you've been living under a rock for ages, but speed weeding is a  different kettle of fish altogether, you will be happy to know. With speed weeding you will not be introduced to a new weed every 3 minutes nor are you expected to chat it up and take it out for a meal. And no hanky-panky either.  Phew, what a relief!
Speed weeding is something to be instantly applied in case of an emergency when, for instance, a bunch of gardeners are about to visit your garden the very next day and that happy event has caught you with your plants down.  Your garden looks a mess, even though it looked pretty good 5 minutes ago before you realised that a visit from gardening friends was imminent. What to do? Panick is an option, it always is, but why not go for a spot of speed weeding instead? So much better for your nerves, I promise you, simply immerse yourself in the Zen that is speed weeding.
 By now, gentle gardener, you are gagging to know how to speed weed to get your garden looking all pretty and shining, not to mention immaculate, for that all important visit from fellow gardeners in less than 24 hours. In short you want me to dish the dirt. Righto!
Speed weeding is the art that wily gardeners like yours truly have developped in case of a garden emergency. What you do is simply remove all the weeds that shamelessly and blatantly are messing up your otherwise gorgeous garden. Weeds hiding away in corners or simply out of sight you leave be, no time to pull those out. Just get rid of those that have a frightfully high profile and can only be missed when you have both eyes firmly shut. That's it!
 And while you have been franctically scrolling down to find out how to speed weed, your search has been wonderfully illustrated by images of how the Bliss garden looks at the mo. Utter Bliss, I know.

Copyright 2010 Y.E.W. Heuzen

30 comments:

fairegarden said...

Yes, you had me simply gagging to know how to speed weed, YE! Your visitors will be wowed by how beautiful, and weed free your lovely spot of soil is. Tara looks to be a bathing beauty herself. 24 days 'til Malvern! :-)
Frances

Sylvia (England) said...

Yolanda, I enjoyed a chuckle as I often do this but I only pull those weeds that will seed! Sometimes with deep rooted plants that means pulling off the flowers until I have time for a proper weed. The other way to make it look really nice to to put some potting compost on top of the weeds, especially on top of tiny seedlings. Hoeing is no good if the weather is damp, they will only grow again.

Hope you have a really enjoyable time with your visitors. Best wishes Sylvia (England)

Diana said...

Okay, I will admit it - I need speed weeding here. I've been focused only on planting and the weeds are waiting impatiently to be pulled. They want some attention! I should invite a gardener over right away - why, you should come visit! (LOL) Nice to see a weedy patch of Bliss, too, to know it isn't All Bliss, All the time!

sophie munns said...

Im into this Idea Yolanda... very smart of you. Especially i imagine if you know what needs to be gotten rid of as a priority.

I practise this appoach to housework which is fine if you are having frequents visitors but a bit nutty if you dont!

For a really good spring clean/garden style up then a party or such is a great incentive!

Good tip ...
enjoy the warmer weather and spring time delights!
Sophie

GardenJoy4Me said...

Yolanda girl !
That was too funny to read this morning : ) Thank you for making me laugh !
So do we get another lesson on just how to do this to perfection ? down to a science ? LOL .. I think you must have it as an "art" by now : )
Tara in her own swimming pool .. now how darn CUTE is that !
Joy : )
All the puns were PERFECT girl !

Lisa at Greenbow said...

Tara has the right idea. Jump in the pool and forget those weeds. Of course as a gardener I wouldn't be able to do that so your speed weeding advise is spot on.

mss @ Zanthan Gardens said...

Hilarious. I've often been "caught with my plants down."

Now that you've done your garden, can you come speed weed mine? Austin's been lucky with rain these last six months but my weeding habits fell by the wayside during the two years of drought, when nothing (not even weeds) grew. It's a jungle out there now.

Lisa Blair said...

Hehe, I have definitely done my share of speed weeding. Love this post!

Robin's Nesting Place said...

I've been weeding for days here, It doesn't take long for them to take over.

Lucky gardeners getting to visit you at Bliss! Enjoy!

Christine B. said...

Is it cruel and unusual to make my kids do the speed weeding for me? I am hatching my plans for this even as I type. Luckily, no weeds yet in the garden. No anything except snow.

Christine in Alaska

Matron said...

Oh! if only...they are just coming up all over the place right now! The lovely Tara has really grown since I last saw her! What a beautiful lady!

nikkipolani said...

Darn. I was hoping you'd come up with a way to get the cats weeding with you. I want to see more of your now-weed-free garden!

Helen at summerhouse said...

I like your speed weeding method. It's a lot like mine, which consists of weeding what I can see from the windows first. This is to keep me motivated to do the rest. Eventually.

VP said...

I'm sure Helen and I will be employing this technique ready for your visit next month!

The first talk I went to given by JAS made a similar point. He showed us a photo and asked what was wrong with what we saw. Not one of us spotted an enormous weed in the photo. That was the point he was trying to make - don't be too pernickity about every single weed in yr garden. Do that and you'll have much more time to enjoy your garden. Which is what they're for anyway.

WV says melded!

Dee @ Red Dirt Ramblings said...

It *is* utter bliss my friend. My mother called that kind of cleaning "slap and dash," and I realized that will children at home for the last 20 years, I am always speed weeding. It is only now with one gone, two teens and a younger bit, that I can leisurely weed. Your post made me smile, Yolanda E. Thank you.~~Dee

Monica the Garden Faerie said...

LOL, actually my burning question hasn't to do with speed weeding but rather in wondering who your blogger friends are who visited!

It's very true one's garden suddenly changes when when thinks others are going to see it.

Love the expression caught with your plants down.

And, finally, Fiona thinks the photo of Tara in a wading pool is an excellent illustration of why cats are smarter than dogs, LOL! James has a much nicer disposition and no string feelings about the wisdom of standing in water.

Naturegirl said...

I rushed right over and guess what I have been living under something for some time because I don't know what "speed dating" is?? Yup I've been with my guy living in our cave now for 40 some years and guess what
((HE IS THE SPEED WEEDER!!)) Hates weeds...they never have a chance to show off...as he beheads them just like that!!
Now I wonder who those friends are..would they be the group that went over to England for the garden show..hummmm...I can't wait to see your report of that visit! Hugs to all of you! anna

flightplot said...

I really enjoyed reading this as it made me smile, and I also love the photos!
Many gardeners find weeding very theraputic, but I'm not sure that I do. I suppose that I'd call myself a minimalist weeder.
As for being being caught with my plants down...!
Happy weeding! Flighty xx

Katarina said...

I could do with some speed weeding right now - my garden's a mess! But later on - when most chores are done - I actually like weeding...it cleanses my brain...

Gail said...

I love this technique...and employ one I call..."Pay No Attention To the Garden Behind the Curtain" (apologies to the Wizard of Oz for stealing his line). It magically erases parts of the garden I wish them not to notice!
...and yes, my dear, your garden is utter bliss! gail

Tattered-Spinner said...

Oh, you have such a wicked sense of humor! I love it :D

Glo said...

Speed Weeding ~ LOL Very good! Isn't it wonderful to welcome spring at last and have such great weather? I sure think so. I can imagine you speed weeding your way around the garden ... sometimes we need such an occasion as visitors to get moving...really speedy! I'm loving the cherry blossoms at the moment :)

em said...

ye, i'm admiring your pink trug... i just bought a green one and don't know how i ever lived without it. i hope your visit went well and that no weeds were in evidence! i continue to love your blog; it is one of my favorites!

*Ulrike* said...

I definitely could use some speed weeding here. Once I finish one flower bed the other one needs it again!

Dirty Girl Gardening said...

I'm going to try it next time!

Babara said...

If I only could apply speed weeding here ;-) !! With great interest and curiosity and...finally with a smile on my face I read your post! Weeding is like a "perpetum mobile", a never ending story of...not love...but frustration!
Have a weedless time!

jodi (bloomingwriter) said...

GIGGLE. You didn't mention the one extra way that there is to speed weed; you blithely look at visitors and inform them that those are native plants, or butterfly larval food sources, or beneficial to songbirds, or great bee plants, therefore leading them to berlieve that you planted them there intentionally. Who is to say that you didn't?

MWebster said...

Weeds are definitely a bane in our gardening happiness. They never have the decency to stay away even for a short time!

Your photos are beautiful.

Terra said...

Speed weeding is a blissful thing. I had to say that LOL.

Dating said...

Wonderful photoes!